Sasuke's Secrets
by SarniePolla
Summary: Sasuke's got two secrets. One: He's not the revenge obsessed idiot he appears to be. Two: He's got an awesome talking cat.
1. Prologue

Blood pooled in the streets around him, and bodies littered the ground. He screamed as he saw the figure emerge from the darkness surrounding him, and cowered in fear.

"Why?" he asked, trying to make sense when none was there.

"To tests my limits," the murderous shadow replied. "Cry all you want little brother, nothing will change."

"I won't kill you, you aren't even worth killing. Whimpering and whining for your life. Pathetic." The katana was not sheathed. It remained out, a constant reminder that the one in front of him was a killer. And would do so again if he so chose.

But Sasuke knew he never would. His brother would never kill him, just as Sasuke would never hate him. He knew this, and yet he still went along with the path that was being laid out for him. He was seeing first hand what being good got you, and he knew he didn't want it.

His brother was talking to him, telling him to hate him. To throw his life into a whirlwind of abhorrence and training.

He should have been paying attention. These were the last words his brother may ever speak to him, but they were awful words. Things that his brother would never truly say to him. These words had been forced into his brother's mouth by others. Danzo, Suigetsu, and even their father had brought these words into their lives.

The coup was the cause of all of this. But what was the cause of the coup? His clan was one of the founders of Konoha, and had been trusted for generations. It had all changed when Madara had attacked. It got worse when the Kyuubi was released, and the Fourth Hokage was killed.

None of the causes mattered though, because he was here, right now, instead of going through the past. Right now, Itachi was crying. Not where Sasuke could see, but he could feel the sadness coming from his beloved brother. This was because he had grabbed his sleeve. He had done it without thinking. It was a silent plea, a wish for his best friend to stay. He fell forward as his brother completed the handsigns for the teleportation jutsu. The dust and mud clung to his face as he got back up, and stood, looking around at the traumatizing scene before him. He felt a presence coming toward him, but it was far off.

It was suddenly much closer, and he got into a basic defensive position that most academy students learned within the first month. He had developed a way to use it as an elite and powerful taijutsu, with the correct muscle movements. Anyone who looked at him would think he was just another six year old. Most of his jutsu were built off of basic techniques that even some civilians knew.

The person with the chakra signature wasn't trying to hide, so Sasuke didn't have to pretend he couldn't sense him. This was the person he had felt near the Nakano shrine. They had been staying there for a while, and Itachi had talked to him earlier that day. This man had helped to kill the clan members that Itachi couldn't get to in time.

The man had an orange mask on, with a single hole for vision. He walked through the mass of corpses and gore unflinchingly, and stopped in front of the six year old, glaring up at him defiantly. The black, cloud covered cloak shifted a bit in the wind, and for a second Sasuke could see scars disfiguring the man's hand, forming ugly, shifting, designs. Sasuke had no doubt that the killer in front of him could still perform handsigns, ones that would lead to fatal, bloody jutsu.

"Sasuke." The masked man said, making his name sound almost like a sigh. He didn't reply, as he was unsure how much the man knew, or what he could reply with. After a moment, he felt a hand drape across his shoulder. His own hand shot out, reaching to defend himself. Suddenly, he couldn't feel anything, not the hand on his shoulder, nor the presence of the man who had been there seconds before.

He heard one last plea whispered on the wind before the Anbu arrived.

"Don't end up like me."


	2. Chapter 1

_6 years later…._

Sasuke stretched and did a couple quick, wake-up warm ups after he got out of bed. His cat, Minu, looked up at him question questioningly, sensing his good mood. He merely grinned at his favorite companion, causing her to become even more intrigued by his demeanor. He bent down and pet her head, feeling her soft fur run through his rough, training hardened hands.

His good mood was easily explained. Naruto had passed the genin test after all. He had seen that Naruto was the only one not to pass, and had been upset to see that he hadn't made it, even after two prior tries. He knew it wasn't really the jinchuuriki's fault, most of the teachers hated him and taught him the wrong techniques on purpose. The only good one of them all was Iruka, who would help Naruto with his homework and take him to Ichiraku's stand. Even if the teachers weren't biased against him, Naruto would still have had trouble. The Kyuubi had greatly enhanced his chakra capacity, so the academy's three required jutsu, bunshin, henge, and kawarimi, which all required minimal amounts of chakra, were challenging for him.

Sasuke went down the hallway, and stopped in the kitchen, getting a couple eggs out of his refrigerator for breakfast, grabbing a can of cat food out of the cabinet on the top shelf on his way back to the oven. He gave Minu her meal before he started preparing his on the stove top. Not ten minutes later, he was sitting at the table, a plate with two fried eggs on it. He finished his breakfast quickly, wanting to have plenty of time to get ready for his last day at the academy.

Unlike the other students, he didn't have to wonder who would be on his team, or who would be his jonin instructor. As the rookie of the year, he would be put on the same team as the kunoichi of the year, and the dead last: Himself, Sakura Haruno, and Naruto Uzumaki. His jonin instructor would have to be able to teach him how to use his sharingan when he "awakened" it. The shinobi would also have to be one of fantastic skill, with a working knowledge of Fuuinjutsu, so he would be able to help contain the Kyuubi should anything happen to the seal keeping the demon locked inside Naruto: Kakashi Hatake.

Sasuke pulled on his dark blue shirt, the Uchiha fan printed out onto his back. He couldn't help the small sense of accomplishment he felt as he tied the Hitai-ate onto his head. It wasn't that he was proud he had passed the exam, or any prior test or paper work. His achievement was in remaining undetected, his true skill and maturity levels hidden from anyone but Minu and Nekobaa, as well as his true personality.

He almost hummed to himself as he started his long walk from the lonely Uchiha Compound to the academy, but stopped himself. No reason to risk detection when he was so close to a new level of freedom, no matter how small it was. As a genin under a jonin instructor, a certain amount of growth would be expected from him, giving him a wider range of techniques to use in combat.

He walked through the big double doors and into the large building that doubled as both the academy and the Hokage's Tower. His footsteps didn't echo through the hallway as most of the students did, since he had long since perfected his ability to walk silently. He had to make a mental effort to make noise if he wanted to stop.

The classroom was empty when he arrived, as it usually was. Sasuke liked to arrive at school early, giving him plenty of time to take care of any business he would rather other people not have any knowledge about. He sometimes looked through the teacher's papers to see what they would be doing in the next couple weeks, even if he had already predicted most of what would be happening. Other times, he would just sit down and appreciate the peace and silence of the empty room while he waited for the rest of the class to show up.

He sat down in his chair by the window, and stared out at the street below him. It was early, so there wasn't as much traffic as there usually was, but there were still a few people out. Most of them were business owners in the area, and they were getting to work early to prepare for what they were probably hoping would be a busy day. He saw Iruka walking down the street, and watched as he entered the building through the same doors he had about half an hour ago.

Iruka walked into the classroom and gave Sasuke a polite nod in greeting. He had long since gotten used to Sasuke arriving earlier than him. The first time Iruka had walked through the door, he hadn't noticed Sasuke for a full fifteen minutes. It wasn't until Sasuke had stood up to go to the restroom that Iruka had seen him, and the chunin had jumped nearly three feet out of his seat and in the air in surprise.

He sat and watched as his old sensei rearranged the papers on his desk, writing a few notes on a paper here and there. He saw the bandages on the man, noticing the way he winced almost imperceptibly when he shifted slightly in his seat. Sasuke hadn't thought that Mizuki would have been able to do that amount of damage, since Iruka was far above him in skill. The man's betrayal must have really taken Iruka by surprise. He remembered seeing them eating lunch together during their breaks every once in a while.

As the minutes slowly ticked by, more children walked through the doors, and the sound of Iruka's pencil scratching against the paper slowly changed to the soft murmur of collective conversations. Some of the students came into the classroom alone, but more often than not, they would arrive in pairs, or groups. The only people other than him to arrive by themselves were Shino Aburame and Hinata Hyuuga. Even Naruto would walk in sometimes talking with Kiba, or Shikamaru and Choji.

Naruto chose that moment to walk through the door, his new Hitai-ate proudly on display. He was stopped by Shikamaru, who shrugged and went back to doing nothing when Naruto grinned and flashed his forehead protector at the lazy Nara. The boy's spirits were not diminished, and he merely kept walking on, the same happy look as before still on his face. Inwardly, Sasuke cursed himself, knowing he would be the one to take that joy from the poor boy, outside, however, he remained as stoic as ever.

The door to the classroom was abruptly thrown open, and two girls entered the room at the exact same time, both scowling at each other while they did so.  
"I was here first and you know it, Ino-pig!"

"In your dreams forehead!"

Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno. Both had the potential to be shinobi of the highest caliber, and used to be the best of friends. Then they both got a stupid crush on him and became "rivals" because of it. He could only feel ashamed of them. They shouldnt let something as petty as a crush tear apart their careers and friendship.

He looked up to see Naruto glowering and studying him from his position squatting on the desk. Sasuke glared right back at him, keeping in the character he had built for himself, even though inside, he just wanted to get up and move to a different seat. He saw someone in front of him shift in their seat, moving their elbow just enough to hit Naruto and send him off-balance. Sasuke oh so dearly wished he could just move out of the way, like he had wanted to in the beginning, but stayed their, resigned to his fate. As soon as their lips met, however, Naruto was sent sprawling onto the floor, after being hit with a punch that would put Sakura's best to shame.

Afterward wasn't much better, since he had to deal with the fangirl army. When all was said and done, Naruto could add black as a new color to his blue and orange outfit.

Iruka had left the class to print a couple papers in the teacher's lounge, and walked through the door the minute all the action had died off. Sasuke was sure that he noticed the multiple new injuries Naruto had acquired, as well as the way he was glaring bloody murder at the boy along with the fangirls. However, Iruka hadn't been teaching the class for the past six years for nothing, and knew better than to stick his nose where it didn't belong.

"Well, since everyone that passed the exam is now here, then I suppose we can now announce the team placements." He said, a bit less cheerful than usual. Sasuke supposed it was because they were his first class, and he was feeling sentimental.

"Team One," He began, "Miro Junchi, Karen Toyuma, and Roku Namata." Sasuke listened as the teams were announced, wanting to know if his assumptions were correct.

They had gotten to team six, and so far Sasuke had been right on all accounts. There were only three teams left, and he was certain he would be right about the placements on those team as well.

"Team Seven, Naruto Uzumaki, Sakura Haruno," Sasuke noticed how Naruto shot out of his chair in joy and Sakura slumped over in despair. He also watched as their positions reverse when the last member for their team was called. "And Sasuke Uchiha." Iruka finished.

"Hey Sensei!" Naruto yelled, standing up to speak even louder. "How come I'm stuck on a team with a loser like him?" he asked, pointing at Sasuke, who felt a bit hurt. The kid needed to learn how to take a loss with grace.

"The teams are made to balance each other out and complement each other's abilities," Iruka explained. "Sasuke was the top of the class, with the best grades. You were dead last, having the worst grades of anyone." Snickers erupted from around the classroom, and Naruto's face turned a tad red. He didn't sit back down though.

"You were placed on Sasuke's team so that he could help make up any shortcomings you may have." Iruka finished. Naruto fell back in his seat and slumped down in a position that would make anyone worry about his posture. Sasuke could feel another sliver of pity creeping into his mind. He quickly squashed it, intent on making sure he was considered normal.

"How did you manage to get on his team?" Sasuke heard Ino whisper furiously to Sakura, who replied by sticking her tongue out at the Yamanaka girl.

"Team Eight, Kiba Inuzuka, Hinata Hyuga, and Shino Aburame." Sasuke wouldn't have minded taking Kiba's place on that team. He actually like Shino and Hinata, since they didn't judge people by grades or looks the way most of their other classmates did. It was also an infiltration team, which happened to be his favorite area of expertise.

"Team Ten, Ino Yamanaka, Choji Akimichi, and Shikamaru Nara." _A lot of people are slumping over in despair today it seems_ , Sasuke thought as he watched Ino do the same thing. Sasuke could see the confusion flow through the few students who were still paying attention. He knew that Team Nine was composed of students who had graduated the year prior to them. He had heard that they were actually quite skilled, though they hadn't been entered into any chunin exams to be officially ranked.

"You all will be sitting here and waiting for jonin instructors to show up. It shouldn't take too long." Iruka said, before leaving the classroom.

Two hours later, and the three genin of Team Seven were the only people left in the room. Sakura was laying on one of the desks, and Naruto was pacing the room. Sasuke had stayed in the same position the entire time. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Naruto put an eraser on top of the door, his idea of "payment" for their sensei's lateness.  
"Naruto, you shouldn't do that!" Sakura said, an annoyed and worried look on her face. Too bad for those two, they didn't even realize Kakashi's lateness was terminal. Possibly in both ways if Naruto and Sakura ever got strong enough to actually beat him.

It was about ten minutes later that Kakashi Hatake opened the door of the classroom, blinking a bt as a bit of chalk from the eraser got into his one visible eye. He looked at the three of them with an almost impossible mixture of interested boredom.

"Hmm… let's see here. My first impression of you? You're a bunch of idiots."


	3. Chapter 2

"How about some introductions?" Kakashi asked. They were all gathered on the roof of the academy, and the three newly appointed genin were sitting on a couple stairs, facing their sensei.

"How do ya mean?" Naruto asked. Sasuke knew exactly what the man wanted, and he also knew that they would get nothing out of Hatake that he didn't want to tell them. This was merely a small test for the jonin to see if they had any chance of passing the bell test the following morning. According to the records, Kakashi Hatake had failed every genin team he had ever had, based on their results from the infamous bell test.

"What I mean is I want to know who you are. Likes, dislikes, hobbies, that sort of thing." Kakashi said, his calm voice making it sound as though he were explaining something to a bunch of children, which he kind of was. Sakura and Naruto both got more confused, and Sasuke acted as though he didn't care.

"Umm, Sensei, why don't you go first? Then we could have an idea of what we're supposed to say." Sakura said. Sasuke couldn't help but note that her voice made her sound much younger than she actually was. That would be useful during certain infiltration missions, not that they would get many.

"Alright, well let's see." Kakashi said, pausing as he pretended to think. "I am Kakashi Hatake. I have no intentions of telling you my likes or dislikes. I have many hobbies. As for my dreams? I don't feel like telling you that either." Sasuke watched Naruto and Sakura slump over, when they realized they had learned absolutely nothing from him.

"Now it's your turn." Kakashi said, looking at them all innocently. "How about you go first," he said, gesturing towards Sakura. She blushed profusely at being picked to go first, and started playing with her fingers to release her anxiety.

"My name is Sakura Haruno," she started, almost as cheerful as Iruka. "Well, I really like-" she cut herself off, giggling and looking at Sasuke, who could only shudder on the inside. Her cheeks darkened to a shade of red that resembled her shirt.

"My dreams for the future, well," she stopped in a giggling fit yet again, and Sasuke found himself slowly edging to the other side of the roof. Luckily, only Kakashi seemed to notice his fear of the crazy fangirl beside him.

"That's very good, Sakura." Kakashi said sarcastically. Nonetheless, Sasuke glared at the man, knowing that Sakura's twisted mind would see this as encouragement. "Now how about something you hate?" he continued, either oblivious or uncaring about the anger that was radiating off the young Uchiha in waves.

"NARUTO!" she shouted, and the one in question wilted beside her. Sasuke would have felt bad for him, but he figured it was the boy's own fault for falling in love with one of the fangirls. He was pretty sure they even had cult rituals they did on his birthday. He quickly wiped that thought away from his mind, but not before telling himself that he would have to find an excuse to leave Konoha on July 23rd.

Kakashi nodded, and then thanked her for sharing. Sakura lit up at the "praise" and sat, a huge smile on her face. Her random personality switches were interesting, if not a bit scary, to watch.

"Now your turn, Naruto." Naruto smiled one of his trademark grins, and sat up straight.

"I really like instant ramen, but the kind that Iruka-Sensei got me at Ichiraku's is the best! One of my hobbies is trying all the different kinds of ramen. I dislike the three minutes it takes for instant ramen to cook in a microwave. And my dream is to be the Hokage, so everyone in the village will look up to me and respect me!" Sasuke thought that Naruto may need some variety in his diet, even the Kyuubi couldn't keep him healthy forever if all he ate was ramen, right? Ramen wasn't exactly a ninja super food either, and he wasn't sure he would feel comfortable with a ramen-crazed Hokage.

"How… enlightening." Kakashi said, probably just as worried about Naruto's health as Sasuke was. Naruto grinned happily again, not picking up on Kakashi's sarcasm. Their sensei sighed, before turning to Sasuke. If he weren't good at reading people, then the small bit of apprehension in the man's one visible eye would have escaped his notice. It didn't however, and Sasuke was given the impression that the man though he was a loose cannon. Before Kakashi could tell him to start, he introduced himself.

"My name is Sasuke Uchiha. I dislike many things, and I don't particularly like _anything._ " He saw Sakura looking at him funny out of the corner of his eye.

"My goal cannot be called a dream, because I _will_ make it a reality. I am going to get strong, then destroy a certain someone." He finished, and noticed Naruto blanch at the end of his little introductory. He wondered if Naruto thought he wanted to kill him. It wasn't right to be amused by that, but he was. Kakashi just smiled at him, though Sasuke could tell he was still apprehensive about his new team.

"You all seem to have wonderful, _distinct_ personalities. I should hope you pass the survival test I have for you tomorrow."  
Naruto and Sakura looked at Kakashi with confusion etched on their faces.

"But why Sensei? We did a bunch of survival test with Iruka-Sensei at the academy." Sakura said. Naruto nodded along with her.

"Yea, we got our forehead protector's and everything. We're ninja now, we don't need any more basic survival training. Believe it!"

"Look, I'm only going to tell you this because I'm nice. The second test in general is a secret, so you had better be grateful, and actually try tomorrow." Naruto and Sakura leaned forward, hooked by the ominous tone Kakashi had taken.

"Out of the thirty students to pass this year, only nine of you will become actual genin. THe rest will either be sent back to the academy, or give up." Sakura immediately looked both terrified and determined. Naruto, on the other hand, had outrage spelled out across his face.

"But that's not fair!" He yelled angrily. "Those people worked hard to get to pass that exam, and now you're saying it meant _nothing_!?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying." Naruto glared at him before sitting back down. Sakura was still trying to get over her initial shock. Sasuke had seen something like that coming.

"Now, I expect to see all of you at training ground three at 7a.m."  
He turned around and looked like he was going to leave, but turned around and gave them one last piece of advice.

"Make sure you don't eat breakfast, or else you'll throw up."

Sasuke sat at the window to his house, looking out at the lake and eating his lunch. He wasn't quite sure what to make of his new team yet. He knew all the stereotypical things about them, but looks could be very deceiving. Sakura, a person devout in the life of fangirlism, was actually quite skilled in her chakra control, and he knew that with her intellect she could master many genjutsu.

Naruto was another stereotype. He was deadlast, with the worst grades, and hardly ever did he respect the rules of a competition. On the other hand, he was a great strategizer, though no one gave him credit for it, and he was the best in class at improvisation and traps.

"Your rice balls are getting cold," his ninnekin friend, Minu, observed. "Can I have one?" He wordlessly handed the kitten his bento, preoccupied with thoughts about the new 'Team Seven'. Minu must have sensed he was having some trouble. She gave him a bit of time to organize his thought, eating her rice balls while she waited.

"So," she said, getting bored with his silence. "What's up? Something must be driving that brain of yours crazy." Sasuke didn't answer for a while, thinking about how he could phrase his worries. In the end, he decided that blunt honesty was the best answer.

"I can't understand my new genin team." He told her, glancing in her direction to judge any reaction. Finally, Minu bust out laughing. He frowned a little; he had been hoping her comments would be more beneficial than that.

"Someone finally gave you a puzzle you can't solve!" Minu said, her laughter still evident in her words. "Heaven forbid Sasuke Uchiha finds something he doesn't know the answer to!" He glared at her, thinking that he should have just kept quiet.

He stopped glaring when he felt someone enter the compound. He wasn't the best chakra sensor he knew, but there were seals still in place that alerted the Uchiha when someone outside of their clan had entered the gates. Minu fell quiet as she picked up on his body language. It took him just two seconds to recognize the chakra signature of the person who had just walked in like they owned the place. Of course it had to be Naruto. He slowly relaxed, and saw Minu do the same when she figured out that the person wasn't a threat.

He wasn't sure why Naruto had decided to come to his home, since the blonde practically hated him. Sasukes best guess was that the kid was there to get back at him for the kiss. Sasuke wasn't all that worried. He knew Naruto had an imagination, but he wasn't truly demented. At least, Sasuke hoped he wasn't.

His thoughts were cut short when he realized that Naruto's chakra signature had vanished, and he quickly went to the kitchen, since it was the easiest place in the house to defend. He couldn't sense Naruto anywhere, and Sasuke was internally cursing himself for not training more on that particular aspect of shinobi life. He had figured that with the sharingan, it would be a waste of time. He forgotten about having to pretend he didn't have his kekkei genkai.

One minute, he was calmly sitting at the table, preparing for an attack. The next, he was tied up and laying on his stomach, Naruto standing and grinning triumphantly over him. He could only see the smoke left over from Naruto's henge before the boy was gone, going who knew where. He slowly lifted his eyes to meet Minu's, hers filled with considerably more mirth than his.

"It's your own fault ya know," she said, taking on a lecturing tone. "If you had spent more time on your taijutsu you wouldn't be in this mess."

Sasuke glared at her, before huffing in annoyance. He didn't bother telling her that his chakra system kept him from performing normal taijutsu. He had to make his own versions of the techniques they learned at the academy. He was sure that some of the teachers had noticed, but his guess was that they all thought it was part of the Uchiha Clan style. Because of his certain 'disability', he couldn't use the defensive techniques taught at the academy to stop the attack style the students learned there.

Minu took a couple more minutes to 'lecture' him, before he was finally able to get his fingers together to perform the necessary hand seals for the substitution jutsu. before he left his house to try and find Naruto. He was really hoping that the dobe hadn't done what Sasuke was thinking he had. He had nothing against Naruto, but if that blonde idiot was masquerading around Konoha pretending to be him, then there would be hell to pay.

Unfortunately, said idiot was very hard to find, and Sasuke spent the next hour looking for him. When he did finally discover where the boy had gone, he couldn't help but be disappointed. Naruto looked like himself, so any damage had already been done. He still wanted to know what the heck the dobe had done though. He was about to ask, but then Naruto saw him.

"AHHH! Teme! How'd you escape?" He shouted, looking surprised. Sasuke didn't even have to pretend to roll his eyes.

"It's called the replacement jutsu. I just substituted myself with the scroll on my table." It was one of the most obvious ways out, that practically anyone who had gone to the academy could use. Naruto's face grew red in anger as he realized how stupid he had sounded. Sasuke saw him put his hands together to form a sign, and was surprised to see the symbol for the kage bunshin. Six Naruto's suddenly appeared and jumped into the air.

While Sasuke knew a couple elite taijutsu he had made when he was little, he couldn't really perform any of them to the correct standard. It was one of the reasons he had been able to keep himself from all out forcing Itachi to stay in Konoha during the massacre. He quickly got those thoughts out of his head and got into a stance that he hoped would be able to defend him from the majority of the attacks.

Before anything could happen, all the Narutos suddenly fell forward and clutched their bellies in agony. All of them got up and ran to the bathroom, the real Naruto too eager to be the first in to realize that he could just dispel his clones. Sasuke could only look on in disappointment, because he knew that this idiot had just beaten him in a fair fight. If Naruto was able to beat him, how the heck was he going to get good enough to kill Itachi?

That night, Sasuke lay awake in bed, as he did most night. He wasn't worried about the test their sensei had for them. Nor was he worried that Nekobaa was going to ask him to try and get Tora's pawprint in the encyclopedia after a while. He was worried about Itachi.

He didn't hate his brother. He knew that if he had his way, the massacre would have never happened, and he and his family would all still be living in their house together.

He didn't want to kill Itachi. How could he want to kill his amazing big brother, who had always had time for him when their parents didn't? The one person who had made the time to be there with him, even when he was needed elsewhere.

But Itachi had asked Sasuke to kill him. Itachi had never wanted anything from Sasuke. He had always put Sasuke's happiness above everything else in his life. Itachi never wanted anything as payment for his kindness, or his caring. Itachi had never asked Sasuke for anything in return, until that night.

Sasuke didn't want to kill his brother. But he would do it, because Itachi had asked him to.


	4. Chapter 3

Sasuke woke the next morning to Minu sitting on top of his chest.

"Come on already," she mewled impatiently, "we're gonna be late if you keep sleeping in like this, ya lazy bum."

He rolled his eyes at her, but got up out of bed anyway, the kitten agilely jumping off of him. He quickly went through his normal morning habit, getting dressed, brushing his hair, making breakfast, before going out the door. Minu very nearly followed him out, but he managed to distract her with food.

He almost hummed to himself as he walked down the streets, but he knew that would be a very un-Uchiha and un-Sasuke like thing to do. Besides, being happy because he was planning to purposely fail his genin assessment probably wasn't normal. So, he kept up his perfected "emo posture" as he made his way over to training ground three, ready for the upcoming test.

He had a good number of reasons he wanted to fail. One, Kakashi Hatake was very centered around the idea of teamwork. If he failed and was sent back to the academy, then he would finally have an excuse to be more focused on helping his future team develop. Two, being on a team with the Kyuubi no Kitsune's jinchuuriki along with being the last surviving Uchiha was just asking for trouble. Three, Sakura would be able to become a much better kunoichi without her crush on him to distract her. Lastly, he just didn't want to deal with having any of them on his team. He even had Minu's full agreement that those three together plus him would just be a mess.

So, when he got to the training field, a good hour and a half late, he completely ignored Sakura's and Naruto's sleeping forms, opting instead to just stand and wait for the S rank shinobi who even more infamous for his timing than his actual combat prowess.

The man showed up, three hours later, making him four and a half hours late in total. Naruto and Sakura had woken up about an hour ago, the cold ground being very hard to sleep on and all, and they immediately pounced on him, shouting at the ready to berate him. The man merely crinkled an eye at them, and Sasuke was glad he was going to be leaving this team behind. He was already on the verge of a headache.

"Maa, don't worry about," the masked man said, waving his hand in a dismissive manner. "I just saw this really nice restaurant had opened up the minute I walked by, and I figured I wouldn't mind being one of the first customers. It was such a good breakfast that I couldn't just get up and leave."

"LIAR!" Naruto and Sakura shouted at the same time, knocking Sasuke out of the daydream he'd been using to ignore them.

"Maa, either way I'm here now, so let's explain the rules, hmm?" Naruto and Sakura both looked less than appeased, while Sasuke just stared.

"I have here two bells, and three students. Each student needs to get a bell to pass. Pretty simple, right?"

"But sensei," Sakura asked him in all her naivete, "there are only two bells. How can all three of us get one."

"That's a very good question," Kakashi 'praised' her, giving yet another masked smile, "it's really simple, if you stop to think about it. Only two of you can pass, the other will be tied to that post over there and forced to watch the winners and myself as we eat lunch." Sakura's and Naruto's bellies both chose that moment to rumble. His hopefully-not-sensei didn't even spare them a glance.

"Then again, you could all three fail," Kakashi went on, completely aware of their suffering, "it really just depends.

"But that's just not fair!" Naruto burst out, a look of righteous fury on his face. "Every last one of us worked hard to get these forehead protectors, and now you're saying that we just have to give them up if we fail one little test!? People's hopes and dreams rely on their careers!"

And the lives of everyone in the village relies on the competence of their shinobi protectors, he thought. If you can't work together for the good of the mission, then you're likely to cause someone's death. With that in mind, he decided to go along with the little test Hatake had stolen from the Yondaime. It would ensure Sakura and Naruto would actually understand the man's logic, ensuring they could both "see underneath the underneath", as Hatake was so fond of calling it.

"Maa, maa, it can't be that important to you guys, you're just kids after all." Ignoring Naruto's murderous glare, he continued. "You can start when I say-"

He was interrupted by Naruto, who had plunged forward with a kunai in hand, ready to attack the jounin. Kakashi had caught it easily, and was looking down at Naruto as if he were telling a two year old not to play with his food.

"I didn't say go yet Naruto."

Rubbing the back of his head in obvious embarrassment, the blonde immediately reset to where he had been before.

"Remember, you will accomplish nothing unless you come at me with the intent to kill." He gave us all a level stare. "Go!"

Sasuke shot to the trees, heading to a spot he had found earlier that looked like it would provide decent cover. Deciding he could go a little overboard, he hid his chakra, making sure that only actual sensors would be able to find him. Something he planned to become better at himself in the next year or so.

Sakura was on the other side of the clearing, hiding underneath a bush. She would have been completely unseen, had it not been for her bubblegum pink hair. He supposed she was doing the best she could, but it still made him smirk to see her. Naruto wasn't anywhere to be seen in the tree line, and Sasuke knew it could only mean one thing.

Naruto, you're such a Dobe.

And there he was, in all his bright orange glory, standing right in front of Kakashi, making boisterous claims. He nearly facepalmed at the idiot's audacity, but refrained from doing so.

The battle, if it could even be called that, was completely one sided. Hatake didn't even have to try, pulling out his book as if he didn't have a care in the world. That just made Naruto angry, which led him to make even more mistakes. The guy didn't even have a real fighting style. His biggest way to attack was to spam shadow clones at people. If he weren't already being such a dobe, attacking a jounin in a 'fair fight', he would have felt bad for the guy. As it was, he could hardly contain laughter.

A small chuckle did escape his lips as he saw Kakashi's hidden technique, a thousand years of suffering. Boy, Naruto would be feeling that in the morning. The blonde landed in the water with a big splash, and an even bigger yell. He'd heard Sakura yell something from her hiding spot, something about Naruto dying, and knew she'd been discovered. Hatake turned to where he had heard from her, but was attacked, yet again, by Naruto. Sasuke had to hand it to the guy, he was tenacious if nothing else.

Of course, the fight ended in the same manner as before, and in even less time. It wasn't as funny as the first ending, but he guessed seeing Naruto hanging upside down from a tree would be good enough as blackmail. As soon as Kakashi got done 'teaching' Naruto about how to actually understand a trick, he shot off after Sakura. Sasuke was a bit concerned, seeing as how Naruto was Konoha's so called Prank Master, and he'd just been fooled by a bell just lying on the ground. It made him wonder about the skill of their shinobi, if Naruto was able to pull pranks on them.

Sakura screamed somewhere in the distance, and he figured to was time to make his move. He got out of the tree he had previously been in, and started jogging over to where he thought Kakashi was. It didn't take him long to be found, and soon he was facing the copy nin. Sasuke wasted no time, plunging straight at the jounin with all his meager taijutsu prowess. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know how he'd managed to beat everyone their year in physical fights, but right now wasn't the time to think about it.

Kakashi grabbed the kick aimed to his midsection, and the punch aimed to his face with ease. Sasuke was stuck in his grasp, but he could still see the bells. He reached an arm out hoping they were within reach. His finger barely grazed the surface of one for them before he was sent flying by Hatake. He scowled, hating the fact that he had been beaten so easily, especially when he'd actually been trying. He ran through a familiar set of hand signs, feeling his chakra begin to take a shape that was almost second nature.

"Fire style: great fireball jutsu!" he shouted, letting out a large breath of flames. He could see Kakashi's surprise, and he would have smirked, had he not been busy being a living flame thrower. The fireball jutsu didn't actually need to take the shape of a sphere, and took full advantage of that, having it encompass an even larger area.

He could feel Kakashi's chakra fluctuate, and knew he was using a jutsu to escape the flames. He wasn't supposed to know however, and had to once again resign himself to a less than savory situation.

He glared up at the silver haired man from his position stuck in the ground.

"Lesson three: ninjutsu." He said, making Sasuke's scowl deepen even further. He knew exactly what ninjutsu was, thank you very much!

"You're right Sasuke, you are different from the others," the jounin said as he walked away. "But is that really a good thing?"

If only you knew, you lazy bastard.

—

"I'm extremely disappointed in all of you," Kakashi said, glaring down at them. Naruto fidgeted from where he was tied to the pole, uncomfortable with the man's gaze. Sakura was staring at the ground, red blooming across her face.

"I told you, you need to see underneath the underneath. Have any of you ever seen a three man genin team?" Naruto shook his head, and Sakura's gaze fell even lower. "The purpose of this exercise was to see if you could put aside your career differences and work as a team. Obviously, you could not."

Naruto and Sakura objected to this, saying they didn't know. Sasuke tuned out their meaningless objections, thinking instead of how he would survive another year at the academy with these two. Come to think of it, hadn't Naruto failed twice already? How many times was he allowed to retake a year? Sasuke sent a discreet glance over to the boy who was tied up to a wooden pole, and felt a flash of sympathy. He didn't want to get involved with him. He knew if Minu were here, she'd tell him to help the guy out. Darn, sometimes he really hated that kitten.

"Give us one more chance." He said, speaking up for the first time. Kakashi turned his single visible eye on him.

"Am why should I? You've already proven you can't work together, what more proof do I need of your idiocy."

"Now we know we should work together, and we can better use each other's skills to make a plan," he said, ignoring the slight. "You can go harder on us, see if we can adjust to meet standards."

Kakashi looked like he was pondering over it for a minute, but he knew that the ninja had made up his mind with Sasuke's first sentence. He just didn't know what his decision was.

"Maa… ok!" He said, cheery demeanor back in place. "But only you and Sakura get to eat. If either of you feed Naruto, then you'll fail permanently. You won't be allowed to be sent back to the academy. Your career will end here." On that last positive note, he disappeared with a shunshin.

They ate in silence for only thirty seconds before Naruto's stomachs grumbled. The boy looked down, ashamed at his weakness. Sasuke rolled his eyes before proffering his lunch to the other kid.

"Huh?" Naruto asked, using his superior intellect.

"You are hungry. That leaves you weak. If you're weak, then the team is weak, and we fail." Naruto had tears collecting near his eyes, and Sasuke nearly flinched at the level of emotion that three gruff sentences had brought forth. It wasn't sympathy that made him cringe, it was that fact that he'd been living in isolation for six years, and just didn't know how to deal with it.

Luckily, Sakura stepped up to the plate, offering to feed Naruto instead, because she was on a diet. That was something was going to have to change, and fast. But it was something that Kakashi would have to deal with, as he didn't want to be stuck here any longer than he had to. Sakura was feeding Naruto a single bite when Kakashi showed up, fury emanating from his body.

"You broke the rules!" He said, his voice deadly. "Failure means death in the shinobi world!" Angry black clouds gathered behind him, and he glared at us with hatred.

"Any last words?"

Sakura, a quivering mess, looked at him, a defiance Sasuke hadn't expected to see in her eyes. "We needed to help the te-team." She said, her voice breaking a bit in the end. "If Naruto was weak, then we would have lost. We're in this together!"

"We're a team. We win and we lose as one." Sasuke surprised even himself by saying that. He was producing a litany of curses in his head, knowing there was no way he'd be able to fail now.

"No way is someone as stupid as you gonna tear us apart!" Naruto shouted at him.

"Very well…" Lightning crashed in the distance, a product of the genjutsu. "You pass!"

—

Sasuke headed home, disappointed in himself. Stupid morals, and stupid cat too, they'd made him pass. Now he was stuck with a team of idiots, and there was no way out. Maybe if he just didn't show up tomorrow, everything would be ok. They wouldn't keep a genin who showed up even later than Kakashi, would they? He sincerely hoped not, since that may be his last option.

It may be time for him to bring Minu along with him on missions. After all, if anyone could be annoying it was her. And maybe Naruto, but mostly her. Three minutes in and she'd be laughing at everyone. Maybe then he'd get an excuse to leave early as well as show up late.

Yes, he liked that idea.


End file.
